Monday, December 10, 2012

6. Paragraph -- A Highlight of My Christmas Vacation

What's wrong with this paragraph? 


            A day at the California Academy of Sciences in Golden Gate Park may seem expensive, but it is worth the price.  For the thirty-dollar adult admission, there is much to see and learn.   For instance, once you are in, you can attend planetarium shows about planets and stars, earthquakes, weather, or other topics without further charge.  Other exhibits about earthquakes include a shaking house that simulates the movement of three different magnitudes of earthquakes.  On that tour visitors learn about the San Francisco earthquake, the causes of earthquakes, where fault lines run, and about how to be prepared for an earthquake.  In addition, the academy has an extensive and beautifully designed aquarium that could by itself provide hours of viewing and learning.   Another great aquarium is  the Monterey Bay Aquarium.  Of course, we have our Living Planet Aquarium in Utah, but it's not nearly as large.  Once I got to see baby sharks there that had been born that day.  There is also the African hall with a variety of dioramas, some with mounted animals, and others with live animals, including an entire colony of African penguins.   One of the most outstanding features is the largest spherical rain forest exhibit in the world with a spiraling walkway going up four stories from the underbrush to the canopy.  Above the entire building is a living roof, carpeted with plants native to California, with walkways accessible to visitors.   At the working science labs you can learn about a variety of topics from the experts.   Considering all that is available at the California Academy of Sciences, the cost of a day’s admission  is a worthwhile bargain.  


Claudia and Jennica Dorsey at the Monterey Bay Aquarium           -- photo by a complete stranger, but on Ms. Dorsey's camera






Return, if desired to 1. Paragraph -- A Highlight of My Christmas Vacation