Saturday, April 2, 2011

Description Internal Text Structure

Describing a person:

    My Aunt Gertrude is a very ugly woman. Shakespeare described a woman with hair like wire, and that fits my aunt whose jet black orb of crinkled hair juts out from her head six inches or more.  She's no Snow White, though her skin is as pale as new-fallen snow, except for the yellow and brown patches here and there.  Her nose is a fat sausage with two warts on the tip.  Her lips are hardly there at all, thin and tight and often opened to make a cutting remark. The gray-green irises of her eyes are surrounded not by white, but by pale yellow spider-webbed with bloodshot-red.  She dresses her thin, angular body in long black silk and lace dresses that look as if they've been gnawed on by rats and wadded up in dirty corners for  decades.  Her shoes are high black laced-up boots with three inch heels.  Yes, my Aunt Gertrude will never win a beauty contest, but she's still my favorite aunt -- and my only aunt.

-- C. Dorsey  4/2/11

Orange indicates the topic sentence.
Blue is for the concluding sentence -- the clincher.
Green indicates cue/clue words for description.

Describing a place:

      On November 27, 1922,  when archaeologist Howard Carter unsealed the door to the ancient Egyptian tomb of King Tut, he stared in amazement at the fantastic objects heaped all around himOn his left lay the wrecks of at least four golden chariots.  Against the wall on his right sat a gorgeous chest brightly painted with hunting and battle scenes.  Across from him was a gilded throne with cat-shaped legs, arms like winged serpents, and a back showing King Tut and his queen.  Behind the throne rose a tall couch decorated with animal faces that were half hippopotamus and half crocodile.  the couch was loaded with more treasures.  To the right of the couch, two life-sized statues faced each other like guards.  They were black, wore gold skirts and sandals, and had cobras carved on their foreheads.  Between them was a second sealed doorway.  Carter's heart beat loudly.  Would the mummy of King Tut lie beyond it
from p. 87, Fawsett and Sandberg, Evergreen, A Guide to Writing , 5th Edition